NEWS
by Jeff Gates

The 10 Worst Games of the Last Decade


Last week you saw the Hooked Gamers "Top 50 Games of the last Decade" article, well this week I'm bringing you the shit list. Today we unveil the 10 Worst Games of the last Decade. This list is derived strictly from review scores, no personal input from any staff members. Why is that? A person’s opinion of the worst game they ever played is even less predictable than the best game they ever played, simply because there are far more bad games than good ones. One person might think L.A. Noire is the worst game ever, while that has a good chance of being on a wide majority of gamer’s short list as their favorites. So we choose to stick to review scores from around the web, and trust us, no one ever liked these games.

Horrible Mention: Rogue Warrior (PC, X360, PS3 – 2009)
The 10 Worst Games of the Last Decade

This one likely had the biggest advertising campaign and hype build up of the entire list and that’s why its our “Horrible Mention.” See what we did there? That’s not to say there was much hype going on for Rouge Warrior but it certainly seemed like it had potential. Too bad it bombed pretty hard, in the end the reviews speak for themselves: IGN, Game Informer and GameSpy’s combined scores for this game add up to just 40…out of 300.

10. Fireplacing (WiiWare - 2010)
The 10 Worst Games of the Last Decade

Not surprisingly Fireplacing isn’t the only Wii game on this list, but it is by far the most idiotic. This game basically consists of what anyone can download on their PC as a desktop: a digital fire. Yes, 500 Wii Points for a fire that doesn’t even keep you warm. To some folks a fireplace on your television screen might be a really neat thing to have. By ‘some folks’ I mean of course the kind of person who spent $600 on an HDTV only to play Wii games and watch Jerseylicious in standard definition.
Nintendo Life puts it simply: “It Burns!”

9. Blood Beach (WiiWare – 2010)
The 10 Worst Games of the Last Decade

Man, 2010 was a bad year for WiiWare. The name sounds like it should be a cool game, right? Wrong. For 10 dollars gamers could enjoy life as an anti-air gunner, at one horribly rendered beach, shooting down plane after plane in the dullest of fashions. Imagine essentially shooting spit balls at a single spot on a wall and watching the saliva roll down the surface. Wait, no, that is twice as fun as this piece of crap.

8. Balls of Fury (Wii – 2007)
The 10 Worst Games of the Last Decade

Movie games are more often bad than good, but this one takes the moldy cake. One reviewer went so far as to say “[Balls of Fury is] A shrine to gaming incompetence.” The movie alone was sub-par so hopes were never high for this one. It suffers from some of the worst motion-controls a Wii retail title has seen and a barrage of childish humor. Yes, this is one set of balls to truly forget.

7. SPOGS Racing (WiiWare – 2008)
The 10 Worst Games of the Last Decade

I think we might have to write another article called “The 10 Worst Games of the Decade, Not on the Wii” Seriously folks, what in the hell? I guess there is some solace in getting the Wii titles out of the way early. This one is basically a racing game in where you can customize your vehicle and compete on all kinds of insane tracks. Sounds pretty fun, eh? That is until you realize you are riding around inside an 8-bit wheel (yes, a wheel) and the track designs are so drab they now hang above babies cribs to help them fall asleep at night.

6. Navy SEALs: Weapons of Mass Destruction (PC – 2003)
The 10 Worst Games of the Last Decade

This game is so bad even the descriptions make us cringe: “Your SEAL team has its lethal counter-terrorism objectives.” Period!? Period!? Really, that’s it? I think PC Gamer says it best: “As you're chucking the box, notice how wonderful it feels to be able to aim properly; and as it hits the trash can with a satisfying clunk, you can be assured that you've just experienced the height of its realism.” This is one WMD we all wish George Bush would have found and neutralized.

5. Yaris (XBLA – 2007)
The 10 Worst Games of the Last Decade

Now, it’s time to bite the bullet a bit. One or two of us might have actually liked this game. However, ‘liked’ might be a strong word. Tolerated might be best, if it wasn’t free and packed with achievements it would have never been touched. Though to be honest, since it’s free, we must examine other reasons why not to get this game. Like imagine how much more use you biting your lip twelve times instead of downloading this would be. Plus, the constant barrage of advertisement for a god awful vehicle push this into the top 5.

4. Air Aces: Pacific (PC – 2010)
The 10 Worst Games of the Last Decade

The developer of this bombshell is named Wastelands Interactive; well at least they got one thing right. Air Aces: Pacific limped into Hooked Gamers hands over a year ago and when we got it interest perked, but only for a moment. As our reviewer said this game is “broken, ugly and dull” Plus, it was all made worse by some pretty lofty promises from the developer that the full title couldn’t even imagine living up to. Things like: “this game will be enjoyable at some point”

3. Leisure Suit Larry: Box Office Bust (PS3, X360 – 2009)
The 10 Worst Games of the Last Decade

And bust it did. The original Leisure Suit Larry is loved by a large group of folks for its general immaturity, and while Box Office Bust seemingly continued on that it just didn’t match up. This title is basically one giant sexual innuendo…told by someone who hasn’t been laid…ever. The only real focus of this game is the potty mouth humor and general sex driven comedy, outside of that it’s a giant mess of failures. Box Office Bust is to games what all the newer Lampoon movies are to film, if those movies were five times worse.

2. Elf Bowling 1 & 2 (Nintendo DS – 2005)
The 10 Worst Games of the Last Decade

The only thing that could improve this game is if the title was “Blowing” instead of “Bowling”, simply because then it would at least get a laugh out of people who witness it gather dust on store shelves. Elf Bowling 1 & 2 is the biggest piece of crap in the entire gaming world, oh wait, its number 2. One reviewer said: “Asking me which Elf Bowling game in Elf Bowling 1 & 2 is better is like me asking you if you'd rather eat a spoonful of rat turds or hamster turds.” Yup.

1. Big Rigs: Over the Road Racing (PC – 2003)
The 10 Worst Games of the Last Decade

You might have seen this coming. Big Rigs is pretty famous, but not in a good way, more of a Monica Lewinsky kind of way. Once you popped this game in the disc tray it was apparent that more work went into what font to use for the box art than the actual game itself. Seriously, the guy that wrote the details on the back cover must have spent more time at work (probably wanting to hang himself for lying so hard) than the folks that developed this. Big Rigs is on the top of our list because it simply dominates the internet with the worst reviews imaginable. Enjoy this failure:


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