BattleBlock Theater

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BattleBlock Theater review
Matt Porter


Robinson Crusoe brought his friends

Cruise gone wrong

We’ve all got friends. In Battleblock Theater you’ve got hundreds of friends, and you’re taking a cruise on the SS Friendship with the lot, including Hatty Hattington, best friend to one and all. However it doesn’t take long for the trip to take a turn for the worse, and you become shipwrecked on a mysterious island. Not only are you and your friends imprisoned by cats and forced to take part in dangerous challenges, Hatty Hattington now seems to be their leader. It’s up to you to platform your way across the dozens of levels, freeing your friends as you go, and eventually get to the bottom of what’s happening on this island.

All of the cutscenes are performed in a stick puppet style, and it’s all very silly, but in a good way. It may look childish, but the entire family can get a laugh out of the narrator, whose quips and snide reactions to your performance keep things light hearted throughout. You do get the odd repeated line, particularly at the start and end of each level, but for the most part his lines are original, well written and excellently delivered. The cutscenes are fairly lengthy, but they give a good deal of backstory, and are wonderfully animated. It’s like watching a puppet show at the beach. Only better, because those are awful.

Thump or dash?

As for the gameplay, it contains some fairly standard platforming mechanics with a unique twist or two here and there. When you load up the game you are recommended a gamepad, and with good reason. Some parts of the game need the extra precision allowed by an analogue stick. Even so, some of these parts are let down by needing too much accuracy. A slight flick of the stick still seemed to be too much, sending me back to the start of a platforming section. The controls aren’t quite tight enough when compared with the benchmark of Super Meat Boy.

Other than running and jumping, you’ll be hitting switches, bashing enemies and eventually throwing objects around each level. The cats and other foes you find in each level are more there to be an annoyance than a real challenge. You can defeat them by hitting them enough times or by tricking them into falling into one of the many traps, but you don’t gain anything for doing so, and it’s often enough just to run past them. One type of enemy carries a gem, of which there are multiple in each level to collect, and he runs away as you approach. Another chases you relentlessly and gobbles you up in one go, sending you back to the nearest checkpoint. But the others are generally harmless unless they manage to knock you into some acid or a laser beam.

There are eight chapters, each split up into levels, followed by a time trial at the end of each one. Each takes just a few minutes to complete, and you are ranked based on how many gems you pick up, how long it took you to finish the level, and whether you picked up the hidden yarn, which is often quite tricky to get to. The collectables are used to unlock new weapons like a boomerang or a type of nerf gun, and are also used in exchange to let your friends out and doing so allows you to customise the look of your character. In single player, the levels go by fairly quickly, with a scattering of new mechanics added throughout. There are liberal checkpoints, making progress fairly easy, and you don’t even have to complete all the levels in each world to progress on to the next one. The game isn’t particularly difficult, which is probably a good thing, as it is fairly accessible to anyone who wants to play it.


And that’s important, because it’s in multiplayer that Battleblock Theater really shines. The campaign levels can be played cooperatively by two people, and the levels are adjusted accordingly. Players can fling each other over gaps, and then lend a helping hand over a ledge to pull each other up. One player might have to stand on a switch to activate a bridge, while in single player they would’ve had to put an object on there. It’s smartly done, and it’s a lot more fun than playing through the game alone, if only for the potential step off a switch and let your buddy drop into some water while you giggle with glee.

There are a whole bunch of multiplayer modes beyond the main campaign that can incorporate up to four players as well. Variants of capture the flag and king of the hill exist, as well as a fairly fun basketball style mode where you have to throw a ball into the opposing team’s goal with varying obstacles in between. There’s a fairly decent level editor, and you’re able to download maps that other people have made and play multiplayer modes on them too. There’s a lot of content here for the price, and the community aspect means that even more will be added over time.

Late arrival, no less fun

Battleblock Theater came out on Xbox Live Arcade last year, and although it’s taken its time to come to PC, it’s just as welcome. It’s silly, but in a way everyone can enjoy, and most importantly, it’s a lot of fun to play with friends. Which is fitting, because that’s what the game is all about: friendship. Oh, the SS Friendship, I see what they did there.


fun score


Huge amount of content, amusing and wacky story, a lot of fun in multiplayer


Not the best platforming around, single player doesn’t have the same magic as multi